Lie in bed
Breathe
Breathe

Focus on it
In
Out

Don't focus on not focusing
just focus

Don't think
About not thinking

I Can't

Then sleep
Just sleep

8PM
too early

I Can't

Lights off?

No, I know
that as long as the lights stay on, I'm safe.
From all the images in my head.

Knives
Blood
Gore

That I like to think I am capable of
but I am not.

I Can't

I'm Cold.
Too cold to get out of bed
to find the pills
to find the alcohol
to find the substance

that I know
will finally make
the thinking stop
and switch the lights off

and I won't be scared
of the images in my head
because there won't be any.

I Can't