There is nothing worse than what I've done. I am the lowest a person can sink. I know this for sure now, because when the person who loved you more than anyone else and who actually cared about you tells you that you are the worst person, you need to believe it. I made excuses, I told lies, I was a coward, and none of it matters anymore. I could talk about how I feel right now, but it wouldn't change anything, it doesn't matter. I don't matter anymore. But there really is no where for me to go right now but up, I need to change everything about me. I destroyed her worse than anyone else, but who cares what I say. Or how I feel. She doesn't love me. She doesn't care about me. And she has no reason to love or care.