I wish I knew.
I wish I knew what was coming.
I can’t see the future.

Here’s something else:
Cats are enabled with an evolutionary trait called "tapetum lucidum,” also known as eyeshine.
It reflects light inside their corneas, and allows them to see in the dark.
But, if I also had tapetum, would I want to see what the dark holds?
Would I want to see what lies in the dark?
Would I want to see the future, if I could?

Instinctively, I think I would.
But the Romantic inside of me would regret the choice.
I’m regretting it now.
But some perverse way would persuade me otherwise, to look forward, so as to foresee mistakes I don’t have to make.

I don’t want to make any mistakes.
But I don’t want to cheat.
I’m a paradox, and I’m broken.
But I’m not a cheater.

I know the rules, and however much I don’t enjoy it, I will play by them.