My special place was off the trail, but he couldn't have known me,
I was so young and such an idiot,
Not everyone is genuine but I was so trusting,
I can still smell the sickening mixture of fresh-fallen rain,his sweat, the mud around the creek and salt from my tears.
With every atmospheric collision from the sky my stomach churns tasting the blood in my mouth from his fist thundering against my tear stained cheeks.
When the wind blows I can still feel his callous hands bruising and exploring my unwilling body, and scraping against the most intimate parts of me.
The lightning is when I remember the rock that found my desperate palms and crashing against his temple
The wind howls and the rain finally starts to fall then, near my belly button burns just like it did when the blade he swung wildly cut me before I could run and the water is my heartbeat pounding in my ears, but I can hear him behind me The rush If my blood reminding me Iām still alive mind begging me to stay that way, his threats pushing me further
Head pounding ,body burning, I burst through my front door
And then I start to cry
Rain storms are actually very hard for me to get through due to some other traumas but the storm that passed when I wrote this smelled like that day. Thunder really triggers me especially when I'm alone I used to cry in school when it thundered in the weeks after this incident but then I started to internalize it and I'd just be really quiet on those days. Trigger Warning, ****, molestation, violent attaked on a minor.