It’s as if the moon has gone on vacation
and left me to control the tides
with a broom to sweep the water
and a jet boat to get from shore to shore

Yes

Yes that’s just what it’s like

and when people ask
I can only tell them
That my brain feels like a whiffle ball
when I wish it was a baseball
That getting up and doing things
is like ordering from an incompetent waitress
that just started working this job
and only does it for a little extra cash
That my inspiration is stuck in that moment
when you’ve just woken up
and as soon as you’ve realized the dream you just had
it’s gone
just a feeling
washed away

That’s what it’s like yes
That’s what it’s like
but that’s not in any way
what it actually is
and if I am stopped from that
if I am asked instead
to stop with the analogies
and tell my truth
and say how I am
I don’t know what to do

The honest truth is
I don’t know
I don’t know how I’m feeling at all
I keep making these choices
and running away
I’m isolating myself
because the times I want to tell someone most desperately
are the same times I wish to see no one ever again
are the same times I want to walk out my door
and into the woods
drop everything
and never come back

Do you want the truth?
I’m scared
so scared
so scared always
so petrified
Don’t ask me why
Everything in me
is too big for words to fit
too much to find the start of it
or the end of it
to untangle it
It’s not something from which I can just
pull pieces and bits
to lay out for you to examine
when you ask how I am
It’s a giant hopeless mess I can’t make sense of

Don’t make me look at it
It’s too much
too much
too hard to look at
to try to break apart
so please
just try to trust me on this one

It’s as if the moon has gone on vacation
and left me to control the tides
with a broom to sweep the water
and a jet boat to get from shore to shore

Yes

Yes that’s just what it’s like