When I was just 2 years old my parents pushed each other to the point of breaking,
My house hold was a war zone for at least 5 years… no happy smiles and no giggling after dark
I sat in my room dreaming about what it would have been like if I was the lawyer that ruined my life…
If I could have let this little girls life fall apart right in front of her.
If I could have been the one to say yes to her parents leaving her in a room for longer than should be accepted.
If I could have just sat there looking at her crying mother and done nothing
…
Now im 15, im older… its whatever now
I guess im used to seeing my mom cry and my dad yell for no reason
I guess ive adapted to not having a perfect life like all my so called “friends” do
Sometimes I wonder how that lawyers life was affected like mine was 13 years later
I guess little girls crying every night isn’t a big enough trigger warning…
…
17, I still lay down and think how heartless you must be
You’ve made me wonder, what if its my fault….
What if they didn’t want me, what if I was the one to cause the fights?
No that cant be I was just a child, you said they loved me…
…
I turned 25 today,
I guess I forgive you, you were just doing your job…
And I cant hold you accountable for the pain i've felt for the last 23 years.
I cant blame you for having my life crumble beneath my feet,
I cant tell you how much im sorry for screaming, how sorry I am for sheading all of those tears…
And how sorry I am to tell you that my life line is in your hands…
…
Im going be turning 26 in less than five months!
Guess that means a new begginning, new life for me, but trust me your not getting involved in this one