I guess it's the Thought that counts
But your thoughts don't kiss like your lips do

And im sorry I told you no when you asked for a hug
But how am I supposed to hug you
How am I supposed to comfort you
When all I feel is fear
And you told me that I scare you
And that just scares me even more
I'm so fixated on the thought that I might lose you
I'm so displaced by the thought that I might choose to
I'm just kinda enraged that this is what I'm used to
Like how  big is this fear
Why did I expect her to be able to carry it ?
Why do I regret things that haven't even happened yet
Like I can play it all in my mind
I don't need a fortune teller to tell her she's going to get hurt... that's evident
And I don't need to beat around the bush because the bush just beat me

With this fear I can't feel free.

And the thing about being free is that it's never free
I have to give up this fear that made me, me
And I'm scared to DEATH cuz I can't see
Any form of hope cuz fear is surrounding me
Like this fear is in the ocean but I'll jump in the sea
Like calling it something different is supposed to help
I'm just not sure who you want me to be
So I just feel hopeless trapped in loneliness like I have no one to hold when this gets real.

Because fear became reality
And she was my gravity

But I act like I can still stand tall like a sadducee
I'm sad can't you see
If ONLY you could see what's inside of me
I just want someone to feel bad for me.

But I guess it's the thought that counts