A goodnights rest is a mystery

Maybe heaven is a goodnights rest
Because on this forsakenplanet I can't have  one good night of sleep
There's nothing that could forgive what I've seen
I think my eyes are asleep
But my mind motions to my heart wondering if this is who I strive to be?
And my heart just responds with another question
Like,  is this really Me?
And I can't help but think
Like I literally cannot help but think
I actually wish I could turn my brain off and sleep
But I am in way too deep
I've seen way too many things that one can't just unsee
So please forgive me
For not being as good as I could be
I wish my eyes could see some kinda hope or love that's out there
But I'm surrounded by dark and I can't help it but stare
Like look at what my eyes see ?
What could all these lies be
Let's Believe all of them and see how close to death we can be