please,

i need restarting.

it's been such a feat
offing these viruses that offer me toxins
and we can only blame me
because i let them feed despite how they appear, unsightly
as the manifestation of this disease, progressive.

i'm not deserving of this distinguishing
for responsibility i'm relinquishing due to negligence
and incessant selflessness
synonymous with ignorance

and you...
you only dream of this type of recognition
dedication to your existence makes you far more deserving

but who pays mind to mundane, even if it's right?
though overlooking it entirely...  
that's how me's are made.

and once upon a time, i was.
but today, i am not alright.

-end