May 2017
What if on that night I told you I was in love with you?
Would these steel seams melt away?
Would this collection of misguided dreams dissipate in the rain?
Would you have been mine and everything would've stayed the same for the years that've passed us up and locked away our inner emotions?
Would you have ever felt that way?
Why did you ever tell me you loved me the same.
Because since then all I've ever wanted is to kiss you the way we kiss in my dreams.
Or my nightmares I should say.
Cause every time I day dream about you I think I'm in hell.
Forced to remember all the good times we buried in those hollow wooden caskets sealed tighter than any imagination I've ever had of runung away. Sealed tighter than my hopes when they sunk to the bottom of the ocean each day you found a new suiter.
A new body of warmth and comfort because no matter how many times I loved you at my most.
My most was never enough.
And what does that say about me?
How am I supposed to breath?
When I wake up to a decreased oxygen tank you've pocked tiny holes into so I couldn't breathe.
And I don't want to breathe
Knowing you'll never be with me.
So maybe being the shoulder to cry on is all I'll ever been.
Cause you'll never see past the dreams and realize our beauty.
You'll never see past the outcast
Of our short lasted opportunities.
Like little white lies told when knitting.
Its just now that I'm seeing with my own eyes, why the thread is becoming undone.
Because this sweater of love you knitted me.
Was just a pity gift amongst throw aways you've hidden beneath.
And what hurts the most is knowing you've never lied to me
You've never intentionally hurt me.
You've only accidentally crushed my soul.
And for that I'm sorry.
I truly can't take anymore.
So take me back to that night we ate sushi.
The rain pelted but our voices made it seem like butterflies dancing in the spring.
Window wipers were a distraction to block out awkward air.
And I could've said I love you.
Right then and there.
Please take me back to that moment of serenity.
Because now my emotions are just reasons for you to forget me.
And saying I love you.
Never let's me sleep.
Annie
Would these steel seams melt away?
Would this collection of misguided dreams dissipate in the rain?
Would you have been mine and everything would've stayed the same for the years that've passed us up and locked away our inner emotions?
Would you have ever felt that way?
Why did you ever tell me you loved me the same.
Because since then all I've ever wanted is to kiss you the way we kiss in my dreams.
Or my nightmares I should say.
Cause every time I day dream about you I think I'm in hell.
Forced to remember all the good times we buried in those hollow wooden caskets sealed tighter than any imagination I've ever had of runung away. Sealed tighter than my hopes when they sunk to the bottom of the ocean each day you found a new suiter.
A new body of warmth and comfort because no matter how many times I loved you at my most.
My most was never enough.
And what does that say about me?
How am I supposed to breath?
When I wake up to a decreased oxygen tank you've pocked tiny holes into so I couldn't breathe.
And I don't want to breathe
Knowing you'll never be with me.
So maybe being the shoulder to cry on is all I'll ever been.
Cause you'll never see past the dreams and realize our beauty.
You'll never see past the outcast
Of our short lasted opportunities.
Like little white lies told when knitting.
Its just now that I'm seeing with my own eyes, why the thread is becoming undone.
Because this sweater of love you knitted me.
Was just a pity gift amongst throw aways you've hidden beneath.
And what hurts the most is knowing you've never lied to me
You've never intentionally hurt me.
You've only accidentally crushed my soul.
And for that I'm sorry.
I truly can't take anymore.
So take me back to that night we ate sushi.
The rain pelted but our voices made it seem like butterflies dancing in the spring.
Window wipers were a distraction to block out awkward air.
And I could've said I love you.
Right then and there.
Please take me back to that moment of serenity.
Because now my emotions are just reasons for you to forget me.
And saying I love you.
Never let's me sleep.
Annie
