My first love has a name. He has a story, a dark side, and a side he hides. He has craters of secrets as deep and complex as the moon, and he holds within him things I'll never quite understand. I didn't think someone could captivate my heart so easily and effortlessly. He means nothing to some, but is the world to me. He still has me completely enamored with how perfect and beautiful and kind and loving he is. His dark side, some will never see it. But sometimes you just love everything about a person, and I love his dark side, the side he doesn't show to most. The side he's ashamed is a part of him. His eyes scream for attention, and I see something in him most don't. He is the most perfect human I have ever crossed patches with, and I love everything about him. This world is a treacherous place, and when I begin to drown, he is the person I want to hold me, he is the person I want to run to. But things are different now. Unfortunate circumstances led to one thing, and led to another, and things just aren't the same. I no longer can tell you my secrets. Can no longer know you'll be there to talk when things get to be a little much. Sometimes I catch you watching me. You'll just stop and stare into my eyes for seconds, that seen like time stands still, crack your beautiful soft smile, I smile back, and we continue with our day. It's our little secret, and it seems to me there's something inside you that still screams "go get her". It's nice to know some days, that little part of you comes out that still loves me. I will never stop loving you. And I'm afraid I'll never quite love someone as much as you, and that scares me, but I love you, I do.