everytime i touch
a cigarette ****
to my dry lips
all i can feel
is the softness of your kiss

everytime i empty
my scattered mind
i hear your voice
soothing everytime

i can feel
your gaze
i can seal
your kiss

but i cannot

i like to
lie
to myself

for

i'm lost in the pages
in which
i mapped
each spot
of your
body

i'm lost in the drawings
that i sketched
of your
eyes

        and might i
        just add
        how cursed
        and wretched of a
thing it is
        to be lost
        in something
        that will forever
        remain a*
            memory