apprently I am not alone
but sometimes
   in the middle of the night
  when my foot kicks of the covers
and the fan above me circles around
  spraying cold air on curled toetips
and I cannot sleep
I can't find someone to talk to
sometimes
   when its not quite what I said
  but I can't quite say what I mean
      because I'm afraid of what that means
     and maybe it'll go away
                            anyways
I feel alone
sometimes
     though they love me
   and they kiss me on the lips
    the cheek
      closed eyelids (my favorite,
                        almost itself a dream)
     though they tell me
          and I feel it
I get in my own head about it
sometimes
       it hurts me in the longrun
     because sometimes it never goes away
   and though they kiss me (my favorite)

it's the inside of eyelids
    that keep me up