I checked your hand when I first "noticed" you
That's one of the first things I do
When I feel that twinge of something for a man
People aren't always what they seem, so I do what I can
But your finger was bare, naked and pure
So I continued on, following your lure
You called me silly things like "dear" and "hon"
And you're my boss, so maybe that's something your shouldn't have done
But I watched you, wondering, trying to be indirect
I didn't want you to know what I felt, I don't want you to suspect
And you seemed to be enjoying the little ride
No mention of a woman in your life, or a wife
So then I thought you could be gay
I noticed a hole for an ear ring in your ear lobe one day
It was left over from the eighties: it was only on one side
I came home and went straight to my computer that night
I looked up on the internet which side mean straight?
I remember that whole eighties style, it wasn't great
After that, I knew you must not be gay
Sometimes you'd pay me a lot of attention, sometimes you'd stray
Months went by, and I still didn't know
And my feelings, I tried to not let them grow
But all I got from you was mixed messages
Sometimes you'd ignore me, sometimes you'd be aggressive
Until one day at a party, you were all over me
And I was confused, I couldn't see
why all the attention, was it the wine?
I was nervous, it didn't feel like the right time
And someone asked you a banal question about your house
And you went off on a riff and I was bored, wanted to run away like a skittish mouse
You were trying to explain some silly situation
with hot water problems, that to you seemed like the news of the nation
And what were you doing about it? Another woman asked.
Answering this shouldn't be such a task.
And yet, you looked around agitated
Why is that question so hard? It seemed simply stated.
But then your sentences were choppy, and I knew something was up
You looked up and down, and into your cup.
And then it came out, that word "we"
Something you had never mentioned before, that held the key
to knowing your marital status as I'd tried to find out with my subtle might
My stomach fell to the floor. It wasn't a good night.