I can never sleep anymore. I've been tossing and turning the past hour trying to close my eyes for just a little longer. He said it's always me but that's not the only lie he's told me. He claims it's not about them, but they are all he is about anymore. And maybe he doesn't see it now but he will always be comparing them to me. I will be in his every thought while he ***** that girl in that apartment we made home. He will compare her to me throughout every conversation. He's hurting and I don't blame him for searching for these distractions. All I know is I'm trying to stop missing him. I don't want to see him everywhere and remember the laughs we shared.  I'm ready to wake up and be excited for the day, rather than dreading it. I'm ready to stop waking up thinking today will be the day he asks me to come home. I'm ready for my heart to stop breaking all over again every single day. I'm ready to accept that he was a part of my past, but will no longer hold a place in my future. And one day I will find someone who makes this pain worth it. He will love me and all that I am, even when we get on each other's nerves. He will love me unconditionally. He will always choose me, despite the circumstances. Like he should have done