I think more than you,
specifically,
more than your kindness,
more than the joking,
more than the attention,

I miss the idea of being in love,
of being excited when I looked at the phone,
of being right on the edge of falling into something new,
of being so close to true love that I felt it as a fluttering in my
stomach brought on by the thought of you

I miss having someone to imagine about,
someone real that I can image falling for,
someone who's more than a crush, but not a sure thing,
someone whose arms I want to wrap myself in,
someone whose smile I want to see,
someone who coaxes my own smile out every day,
someone who makes the dreary days worth dealing with,
someone who makes the dreary days less dreary,
someone who makes me a little anxious and confused

I miss thinking that this is it, this is going to be love,
he likes me and I like him and we both know it,
he wants to talk to me, to joke with me,
he must really care,
he will be someone I can share things with,
he will be someone I can spend time with,
he is the one I've been waiting for
he will be my first true love

And so when I think about you,
your ego will have to take a hit,
and I will have to remind myself
that I'm not really thinking about you,
I'm thinking about the last person I
thought I could fall in love with,
and I'm just waiting for someone
to take your place