My loved one,
I know you care,
that your heartbeat beats as one with mine,
a resonating sound,
A tuning fork that hums in the same rhythm as mine.
There are days when we're so alike,
so connected,
and all I want to do is to burst from smiling.
But why do these emotions taint these happy thoughts?
Why must I be so insecure?
So afraid that you'll fade from sight?
As though I'm happier at seeing you,
than you could ever be to see me?
Not that I could blame you,
Not that I don't understand.
I'm not someone people should get attached to.
My sweet,
these insecurities are rooted in a friendship I've made long ago,

Loneliness is my friend,
and with it no one else will come.
Or if they do,
It is nothing more than a brief encounter,
for I am invisible,
and any friends that I meet will surely leave me.
And yet by saying so,
I feel as though I'm underestimating my friends.
That's not the case,
Its just all I have ever known -
The covers of loneliness I have lived in,
Who else has comforted me as much as solitude?
Who was there on those days when I wondered the darkness at recess,
When words were said,
bullets fired from their mouths,
And I, a transparent apparition,
could do nothing but exist without truely living.
Loneliness was by my side,
whispering how it will always stay by my side.
Conditioning me to trust him.
Earning my loyalty,
that will not easily fade no matter how much I wish.
Nothing in this world is permanent.
I will wither and die,
much like you who hear these words.
You cannot possibly say that you can stay by my side.
Everyone else has faded from my life,
These new friends are sure to either hate the real me,
or move on with their daily lives,
I,
a passing existence.
A number,
in the multitude of masses of souls drifting through this world.