i used to say:

"i will not inflate my own expectations.
i will not get my hopes up high.
i will expect to receive only nothing.
if something beautiful happens, then
i will simply be pleasantly suprised and
i will enjoy every last fleeting second.
if something too ugly happens, then
i will treat it with little more emotional
diress than the loss of a toothbrush.
if i do not set my heart on any one thing,
then i will never be heartbroken.

"i will live my life through a filter, a veil;
i will live my life behind a solid wall,
and i will bide my time."

now i say:

"i will expect to recieve only nothing, but
i will cup the promise of something
beatiful within my own trembling hands.
i will guard my precious pumping heart,
but i will not put it away behind lock and key.
i will take cautious steps through life, but
i will still walk the path underneath my feet.
i will laugh heartily, and i will cry miserably.
i will end friendships, and begin new ones in their stead.
i will acknowledge every single breath, and
i will count each one as a precious gem.

"i will step from behind my filter, my veil;
i will open my heart to life,
and i will live."