I am a small bird in an open cage.
Am I imagining this
broken wing,
or is it
real?
How will I know?
I can attempt to
fly and then
feel the pain when
I hit the
pavement.
Or maybe I will. fly.
I won't take the
chance.
I'm so
scared.
My mind is
so muddled.
What am I feeling?
Why do I feel this?
What makes me feel this?
What can I do?
How do I make it go
away?
How long will
this last?
I try to grasp an
answer to every
question.
As soon as I begin
the search
the answers flee
and the fog
rolls in
thick.
"How are you?"
Fine is a lie.
Good
is a lie.
Could you give me
a moment? Or
hundreds?
On my right
hand I have
hope and love...
in Christ.
On my left
hand
I have neither hope
nor love.
I don't feel it.
I must have it.
I don't see it.
I long for it.
I don't deserve it.
I am so unworthy.
I am so unworthy
of God's love, yet
I have it.
Why have I not
worldly love?
Lord, at least tell
me why.
Reveal to me
your plan, your
intent.
My heart is so
heavy, dragged
down by sorrow,
depression, longing, confusion,
worry, anxiety, hopelessness.
I can hardly
hold onto it
anymore.
My heart
is so burdened,
I cannot carry
it.
I hardly feel alive
anymore.
I hardly feel
like a person.
Who cares about
the drama? About
trivial matters?
Anymore?
I am so tired.
Physically,
emotionally.
I would like to
get off this roller-coaster,
to get out
of this glass box.
The air is getting
stale.
I don't know how
much I can take.