Is love so elusive
as to never be found
i wonder why its so
do others flee from me
repulsed by my presence
or does distain for others
reside deep inside
and erode those unfortunates
the few that I touch
until they can no longer hold on
and their grasp is dissolved
and I'm here alone again
what inside me causes this
how can I change it
I feel so isolated
as to be driven insane
like a prisoner in solitary confinement
scribbling on black walls
for years spent suffering
silently waiting for reprieve
free me from this *******, Lord
Only God can save me
from a life of anguish amidst nothing
but the sound of my own breath
how i long to know, Lord
why you gave this life to me
and how i can serve you
and return it with interest
pain is a familiar friend
and sorrow is often my company
how i desire joy to come to me
and remain forever more
but joy will not embrace me
it will only visit briefly
and reject my pleas to stay
as if I have somehow injured it
and finally given it an excuse
to leave me to my tears