I feel closer to whole an entire person when you are gone
And you have not called for so long
That your voice the way it is now seems to be fuzzy.
I don’t have to sit in the room with the way you stopped loving me.
I think my love and my hate co exist to create this place of empty distance.
Kind of like the look I see on your face when for a second you see a glimpse
Of a reality you do not want to see in me.
I can not live in the pain that she perpetually pushes
Me in so I chose to walk form her.
Gawk all you want hell turn your nose up
Like you know whats better whats right
I don’t know whats true for you
But my life has never been so black and white.
So perhaps you aren’t seeing enough or more probably
Your projecting your deep need for a perfect ending on me
And seeing as every one sees that she cannot and will not provide
That for anything living dead or in between
All hostile glances lead to me.
The one who was ****** over in the first place.
That makes sense because clearly I have so much control over what she thinks,
Or does or loves for that matter.
If I did don’t you think I would have made her love me again?
Its to gross a truth to swallow and even harder to spit.
I'm not saying whoa is me pity party just stop giving me ****.
No wonder I no longer miss you, seeing you
More often puts a knot in my stomach and bad taste in my mouth
Than those salty tears when empty stare and lies spill out,
floating around filling my ears.
This is the truth I swallow day after day and the very thing
That mother tries to sweep away. You make me
A little sick like kristianna just someone I’m nice to to keep the piece
And then I go home happy I can finely sit and breath,
Escape from the intangible stink of someone who lies to me and themselves
We are nothing but a scab you ripped off
For so long but has finnaly settled into this
Hard disgusting crater of a puckered scar
That I’m so thankful to have it seems perhaps in it’s own way divinely inspired.
Like the rough faces of the grand canyon or the
Raw nature of a sun flower,
the dual nature of the awe inspired
like a pretty new baby at a funereal .
I don’t see myself ever wanting a thing from you.
Not again not a hug a hello or a smile,
I am fine to always be away from you.
I feel closer to whole an entire person when you are gone
And you have not called for so long that your voice the way it is now seems to be fuzzy.
I don’t have to sit in the room with the way you stopped loving me
perhaps we should stop playing the game and just call it.
you win again a hundred to ten,
If you were bigger you’d a bought it but you stole it.
To much to risk a gamble but you rolled it.
Glad it played how you planned keep my heart
I don't need it you broke it.