This year,
This life,
This senseless ****,
This style,
It all seems like a pattern now.

You know?
Day in,
Day out,
Sunrises to sunsets.
I feel like my life has finally found something hidden in it.
A sort of pattern that just continues to repeat
And repeat itself.
There is no end,
There was no beginning
It just happened like that.

17 years gone by.
I’m stuck in that age between being too young to know
Being too young to do
Too young to feel.
But being to old to know better,
Old enough to be wiser,
Old enough to know this is what is real.

And I'm hatting my adolescent years,
For I've never been able to live it once.
I don’t know what its like to have that sort of freedom
That sort of life.
To be a teen
To live it up, as my peers say.
To be somewhere almost every weekend
To have that sort of social standing with the incrowd.
Because I have always been the outsider looking in,
That was my pattern.
My life style,
That was the sort of senseless **** I went through.
Because no one gave a clue,
What its like to
Be the one your parents have to depend on
Be the one your parents can trust to keep things in order,
To be the one your parents know can leave at home,
Alone.
Because for awhile now,
I’ve been playing adult for four years.
And never once did I live up my life.
Day in day out,
Sunrises to sunsets,
My life has a pattern.