Mar 2012
Chapter 1
Gloomy day that day. Even the bugs had a depression hit, and crawled into their holes and webs to bout over their small and meager lives. The roads were wet from the air, and my P.O.S. van scratched out the traffic. This day was not one for living. It was a gloomy day today. I walked from my car to my school with music in one ear. The music gave the fog a surreal atmosphere, and it added more as I overheard someone complaining about the weather and how its shockingly close comparison to a human could not make up its mind. I walked down the stairs, and in the break of the fog, I saw my beautiful girlfriend standing, waiting for me. I performed my routine to show my love. A kiss, a hug, and so on. She only stood there. It took me this far to realize something was wrong. This has only happened a few times before, and each time I had a whole flock of crows explode from unrest and bounce about in my stomach, trying to find an exit. I had this fear about these that she would say the dreaded words and end the relationship. They mostly came around as family problems or a death in the family, and the best cure is some tea and chocolate. This time around, I had only a few black crows seem to find their way in me, and I was ready for to hear all her mom’s rage towards her. One hand on her back, I asked. And even with so much strength do get ready for the moment, I was not. She jabbed at my stomach, exciting the crows even more. She hammered at my knees, and drilled into my skull, sending her coarse little message deeper into my mind. With nothing else to take in, my brain ****** in each piece of the sentence, detailing the voice over and over in my head. With one last blunt blow in her apology for the pain she sent me, she walked away to float about in the emptiness that she gave me.
Before this moment, I would look around and be reminded of everything she was and how she meant to me. I guess this was just in the second nature of my mind, and no pain ever came from thinking about her so thoroughly, until this moment.
I have only felt two different ways of pain; The one universally obvious and real that you can revisit every part of a moment and break it down into colors and textures. We all feel this, and avoid the feeling the second time, or the third, until there is no life left, and you pass aways of natural causes or not so unnatural. That is where the second one comes in. This feeling has no explanation or details. My theory is that of suicide. When someone dies when they should not have, there is an emptiness in everyone they met and will meet. That means there are thousands of people who’s lives you needed to change, but you didn't, because you were to busy dead. I’m sorry, I’m feeling a bit down lately, for the obvious reasons. I didn't mean to take it out on you.
Chapter 2
Are you hungry? I’m a bit hungry, I’ve had almost nothing to eat for a while now. I guess that is what happens to you when you don’t eat for a couple of days. I am not in the mood for anything stuffing. That’s the problem with food around here. We have-how may “non-greasy” choices do we have around here?. I want some ****** sushi. It just doesn't stuff you like other foods. Are you hungry? Oh, well of of course you aren’t, you’re a-, well I guess I shouldn’t assume. Are you hungry? Fine, story it is.
The first day after the moment seemed to drag on for weeks. I would look around and see the dark blue of the lockers around me pierce the fog that seemed to follow me. It was not a cloud to rain down and symbolize my sorrows, or mist to precede the looming monster that lurks in these swamps. This was a dense fog with the only intention to consume me. People would quickly walk past in fear of this fog, and simply pass a glimpse on the
Gloomy day that day. Even the bugs had a depression hit, and crawled into their holes and webs to bout over their small and meager lives. The roads were wet from the air, and my P.O.S. van scratched out the traffic. This day was not one for living. It was a gloomy day today. I walked from my car to my school with music in one ear. The music gave the fog a surreal atmosphere, and it added more as I overheard someone complaining about the weather and how its shockingly close comparison to a human could not make up its mind. I walked down the stairs, and in the break of the fog, I saw my beautiful girlfriend standing, waiting for me. I performed my routine to show my love. A kiss, a hug, and so on. She only stood there. It took me this far to realize something was wrong. This has only happened a few times before, and each time I had a whole flock of crows explode from unrest and bounce about in my stomach, trying to find an exit. I had this fear about these that she would say the dreaded words and end the relationship. They mostly came around as family problems or a death in the family, and the best cure is some tea and chocolate. This time around, I had only a few black crows seem to find their way in me, and I was ready for to hear all her mom’s rage towards her. One hand on her back, I asked. And even with so much strength do get ready for the moment, I was not. She jabbed at my stomach, exciting the crows even more. She hammered at my knees, and drilled into my skull, sending her coarse little message deeper into my mind. With nothing else to take in, my brain ****** in each piece of the sentence, detailing the voice over and over in my head. With one last blunt blow in her apology for the pain she sent me, she walked away to float about in the emptiness that she gave me.
Before this moment, I would look around and be reminded of everything she was and how she meant to me. I guess this was just in the second nature of my mind, and no pain ever came from thinking about her so thoroughly, until this moment.
I have only felt two different ways of pain; The one universally obvious and real that you can revisit every part of a moment and break it down into colors and textures. We all feel this, and avoid the feeling the second time, or the third, until there is no life left, and you pass aways of natural causes or not so unnatural. That is where the second one comes in. This feeling has no explanation or details. My theory is that of suicide. When someone dies when they should not have, there is an emptiness in everyone they met and will meet. That means there are thousands of people who’s lives you needed to change, but you didn't, because you were to busy dead. I’m sorry, I’m feeling a bit down lately, for the obvious reasons. I didn't mean to take it out on you.
Chapter 2
Are you hungry? I’m a bit hungry, I’ve had almost nothing to eat for a while now. I guess that is what happens to you when you don’t eat for a couple of days. I am not in the mood for anything stuffing. That’s the problem with food around here. We have-how may “non-greasy” choices do we have around here?. I want some ****** sushi. It just doesn't stuff you like other foods. Are you hungry? Oh, well of of course you aren’t, you’re a-, well I guess I shouldn’t assume. Are you hungry? Fine, story it is.
The first day after the moment seemed to drag on for weeks. I would look around and see the dark blue of the lockers around me pierce the fog that seemed to follow me. It was not a cloud to rain down and symbolize my sorrows, or mist to precede the looming monster that lurks in these swamps. This was a dense fog with the only intention to consume me. People would quickly walk past in fear of this fog, and simply pass a glimpse on the
