Time? Its 9:00
Driving to town
You're happy to finally see an old friend
You call her your girl
Pulling over into a convenient store lot
You check your phone
Something came up
She canceled
Sadness fills you
So you text a friend
Earlier he said you two would hang out
But he canceled too
You begin to feel lonely
You message a bunch of people and no one responds
A cigarette finds its way to your lips and its lit
A walk around town
Dark and empty, you only see a few cars go by
What time? Its nearly 10:30
You're all alone
Sad, frustrated, lonely
All by yourself
You realize you've gotten to your second smoke
You keep walking
Brief moments you can see your feet and the walk way in front of you
The night is empty
The street lights are dull
Infrequent
The pavement under you chills your feet
A chill that creeps up the bones of your legs
Creeping
Until the hand ashing that cigarette is shivers
Back at your car
Time? 10:20
Your phone lights up
You're blinded by its light
A message
A stranger? A guy? A friend?
Someone you know
He "hits you up"
You know what he means
You're hesitant, but lonely
So lonely
The street light pass, like a drunk strobe light
Off and on, off and on
You can make out the worn and shaking hands on the steering wheel
You don't know how, but you're in the car, a block from his house, before it hits you
You feel sick
Lonely and sick
You're there
A dim light
A couch
Cold again, you're laying down
Now you hurt
Lonely, sick, and hurting
The world moves in rhythm
Back and forth
The dim light is a haze as your eyes unfocus to block out the world and its rhythm
Time? Its 11:15
Cold again the rhythm changes
You want to cry but can't
You haven't been able to in a long time
The third cigarette is smoked