You want me to believe that this world is complete, delicate, special.
But how can I believe such a thing when nothing is being done to the children and adults who get abused and neglected?
How can I believe that this world is protective when the police system did nothing about a rape situation of a 6 year old girl?
How can I believe that this world is complete when we can't even be different without being judged?
How can I believe that this world is special when there's still so much wrong with it?
How can we see the world as such a thankful life when we can't even go out on the front porch to play without someone shooting accusations at our mind; making us think this world is perfect when in a real reality... it's not.
There's still poverty and blood shed of innocent victims because we pick the wrong people to "protect" us.
There's still so much to learn even if we can't see what the future may hold.
Ask me...
Ask me how my life is.
What has happened in my life?
So many things I wish I forget.
There's the alcoholic father:
The one who lets his daughter sip his beer to get "enjoyment".
There's the missing mother:
The one who never fought for her daughter and never looked for her.
Then there's the sister:
The one that would make people happy; was always a joy to be around but everything changed when she was gone.
At age 4 there was a little girl who wanted everything: a happy family, a fun life, protective brothers but that girl got the complete opposite.
Age 5:
Age 6: Raped
Age 7, age 8, age 9
Age 10: Depression
11: Depression
12: Anxiety and depression
13: Anxiety and courage
14: Panic
15: Depression, anxiety, panic
16...
Age 13 was the year the girl finally told her sister-in-law about the rape her brother did. Only 3 people believed her.
Not her father, not her father's girlfriend, not her 3 brothers, not the police.
She was alone.
She tore and ripped through her anxiety like it was nothing to achieve absolutely... nothing.
There's a woman trying to get a boy into her car while he screams, "You can't make me!"
There's a man forcing a woman to have sex after 3 times that morning and she says, "You can't make me!"
There's a little girl being abused by her father when he said, "Kill yourself."
That girl slipped through his hands and past his heart while the knife hit hers, and she whispered her last words to the alcohol running along her father's lips and the cheek he pressed against hers while he forced things upon her all done by laying in the hospital bed whenever she had come to see him. She silently took her last breathe with the words, "Daddy, you made me do this."