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Mar 2012
What I didn’t tell you that day is that I love you
Because I was afraid you would change towards me
Treat me differently and that I’d have to act differently
When all I know how to do around you is be with you
The way I am now and with the person you are
But right now I want you
So intensely that it affects my health

My blood pressure is higher
My mouth is drier and my breath is beginning to smell
Like tartar and decay and maybe it’s because
I feel I’m rotting inside
Like something is dying and withering in me
And I know it’s my strength
How I feel about you
The amount of me that I can devote
To you to see you are happy
The fuel for the words that deny your every self-defeating doubt
Tell you you’re marvelous and perfect at least all right

Please don’t go away
Run away or treat me differently
Just love me and say it every chance you get
Love me more
Add to it and build upon it
Give me permission to be
In love with you
Like I already am
Wanting you to be different
Without going away
Wanting you to be in love with me
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