I keep on writing
to continue hiding
myself from the fears of failure and regret

but I've been fighting
while agonizing
over what by now I thought I'd forget

like those stupid moments
the disappointments
when each word gets more stifled than before

it's evanescent
the coalescence
the sinews carrying my heart have torn

were we ever happy?
I'm just asking
because I don't know if we ever were

just placating
the soul from hating
but it never really seemed to bother her