Why do I tense up when you're around?
Why does my heart beat faster?
Why do I hold my breath?
We can't be ourselves around you
I am stuck
I made the choice
Birthdays pass
Years roll by
Anniversaries come and go
Embarrassed to show my face
No more thoughts of the white lace gown
With my father by my side
Going down the aisle
Gave that dream up for you
Now I have nightmares
With red rolling clouds
Silent screams
Ancient trees
Trying to get out
I want to wake up and breathe
This is not life
This is not me