It's only on the nights that everyone's busy and my mind isn't occupied that I sit back and think about what we would've been doing on a quiet Saturday night. When my parents were out of town and the house was chilly and smelled like peppermint from the tea I'd be drinking.  I make my bed because I have nothing better to do and think about how we would be unmaking it in the most beautiful way if you were still here. But who knows if you're even you anymore because I haven't talked to you in so long. I drink alone to get rid of your memory, but I remember how your kisses tasted like ***** and strawberry gum and stop to cry for a moment because I miss those kisses so much.  And now I can't even make myself peppermint tea because it reminds me of the peaceful nights when I thought you loved me.