I remember when I heard a song
and thought of the future.
Dreamt about a day, when maybe I could identify with the words I heard, and the emotion behind them.
I remember a day
When I put a song to a face.
Memories and eras of my life filed neatly away in perfected playlists.
On occasion I reminisce with the old tunes I used to cry and laugh to
and bring upon myself a sense of longing and nostalgia.
Alas the notes I fill my mind with now all bring me to think of you.
I was never one for a sappy love song, I wanted anger and revenge all tied together with angst.
broken hearts and tattered dreams, that’s what I wrote about, that’s what I wanted to hear.
Someone came along however, and changed my tune, so to speak.
Suddenly, those love stories I dreaded came to life,
I could relate to the pop song about a boy and a girl, and I liked it.
You tore down the walls I had so meticulously built and stole my heart with a tear stained smile and a wink.
And I still hold those moments dear, and replay them in my mind like my favourite song.
The smile.
That night you told me you had to go and find a place that felt more like heaven, because living felt like hell and you hated it here.
You smiled through your tears.
I continue to be enticed by the way the happiest expression known could hold so much sadness…
And while it broke my heart, it also made it beat a little faster.
The wink.
I begged you to come and see me
and when you finally came to my side
you made no communication, and all my longing to hear your voice remained unfulfilled.
I was frustrated and you knew it, so you caught my eye.
And you winked.
I turned my head and rolled my eyes to hide the smile and blush spreading across my face.
God, you’ve made it hard to love you.
But it's true to say since those moments I’ve been yours and all yours and there is not many a thing that could ever change that.
As long as you let me, I will continue to repair the pieces of your broken heart,
As you have done for me.
Maybe one day, we'll both be flawless as we were in the beginning.
Before reality and the worst of people tore us apart from the inside out.
You changed my heart, and my tune, and my life.
You are in every way what I have been searching for, and I will never forget the way your name makes me feel.