IV
i face myself as i look into the mirror of ice,
produced by your cold breath freezing my tears.
i can't breathe myself, but at least frozen water
is easier to walk on than blood boiling with passion.
you tell me, that i can't keep balancing on
the shaky concrete you provide me -
that i will drown taking my next step
and you won't keep me over water.
I was never yours to save.
V
i turn my back at you,
though i can't make myself walk.
I'm stuck.
X
i look into his eyes,
and i see everything you weren't.
i don't know if i think he's better
but he's at least better for me,
than the memory of who you used to be.
I try. I do. I really do.
XII
he kisses me,
and you're nothing but a distant voice,
screamingly telling me to watch out,
so i won't drown in another guy's lies.
(but the voice is shaky,
because it knows, it has no right.)
i ignore you.
I try, I really do.
XX
I forgot you years ago.
That's what I'd like to think, at least.