i still have an indent on my left pinky finger
from the ring i wore that reminds me of us
the little metal heart that was once a dusty shade of pink
i painted it blue
the shade of the dress i wore on our first date

i still think about the mural
as you watched me paint
i could feel you falling in love with me and
i could feel myself falling in love with you
you're in every messy brushstroke on that canvas

i painted our hill on a canvas i bought on clearance
i painted us and the stars we would look at
i promised you that i would someday show you when it was complete
You never got to see it

as i painted, you painted me
quick and loud strokes of electric blue and silky red
and the happiest shade of yellow id ever known and
you signed your name with a kind of pride i never expected

i lay in the puddles of your paint and
i wonder if i will ever out grow the indent
or scrub off your four lettered name off of my hand
off of the in-between of my fingers
off of my forearms
off of my waist
off of my shoulders
off of the small of my back
off of my quivering chin
off of my flushed cheeks and
off of my expecting lips