when i'm reminded that i'm human
things swim out of focus
and my eyes work hard to catch up,
but they can't

and my heart races like a
man keeping beat for the band
and i can't help but realize
something the size of my fist
keeps the blood in my body
from sitting stagnant

and my brain wanders
to the darkest corners
covered in dust and cobwebs
behind the bookcases
that chronicle my 23 years
finding the most vile and disgusting
pages that make me up,
the ones i thought i had
torn out and thrown away

and you sit there with that
knowing smile, shaking your head,
because this isn't the first time
that i set myself apart from the rest

and i stare back straight into your
eyes and calmly whisper
that i'm not one of them

but my heart keeps on beating
and pushing the blood through
one piece of living
flesh to the next
and into the brain
that looks like any other,
and just like you,
without it, i'd be dead