When in doubt, say something funny
and then smile amusingly.
Everyone will think you’re charming
and they´ll treat you pleasantly.

Talk about the newest scandals
or some spicy love affairs.
But don’t waste your breath on business,
or the value of your shares.

No one wants to be reminded
of the failed economy.
Stick to pleasant subjects like the
latest fashion novelty.

And remember to go easy
on the blasted alcohol.
Proper conduct must be shown
and drunkenness will spoil it all.

Leave the place while you’re still sober.
Give no reason for disdain.
That way you’ll be well remembered
and invited back again.