I'm going to bury the hatchet But this time Instead of putting it six feet under where it belongs I allow myself to bury it in my own back Again For what seems like the millionth time I've allowed myself mutually assured destruction Like Hiroshima Or the red scare I systematically break down all the positives in my life Everything that brings me joy Everything worth living for I destroy it all Not with words Or by actions But by simple thought alone This terror I cause myself is nothing new In fact it's my closest friend My worst enemy My mother My self This anxiety This panic This restless nights and dreary days Are what makes me who I am I am nothing without it And with it I am nothing I am Nothing