Why do you seem to hate me?
Is self hatred not enough?
I do not need your feelings towards me too
I can handle it on my own
One’s worth of bitter swirls
Of sharp and pointed words
Are way past enough
The daily equivalent
Of an unbalanced diet
Maybe you do not realize
What passes through my head
The part of me that sometimes
Thinks it would be easier if I was no more
That denies the selfishness of the act
Despite the fact
No matter how much hate
I know there are some
That love and care for me
And my death would tear apart
But it hurts so much to think
You are only using me
I am good enough to do this and that
But never good enough
To make you prideful
That I am your born from your *****
Instead one-hundred and ten
Is never enough
You want every last morsel
Of my attempts and efforts
Why am I never good enough?
I want to get along
But I can not simply watch
As your missiles pelt my skin all over
And break my heart
Or fill my mind
With an addendum of scorching lies
Like you it is in my nature
To fight back when I am fired at
You must call the battle off
Because I can not back down
Every time I have tried to drop my shield
To let us be on good terms for once
You have taken advantage
Of the opening in my armor
What does it matter though?
I have been fighting the bullets for so long
More than you know has gotten through
I am more broken than you realize
A surrender is not on the horizon
I will not give up the fight
Instead the bullets fired
By both outside and inside threats
Will have to bring me to my end
So stop the war now
If you love me in the least
Stop pretending you are like the other’s
And be what your title says you are
I need you to build me up
Even though it is you
That assisted in tearing me down
Because no matter what
It is your approval
That I seek
Every single night in my dreams
And in the day
So pretty please
Show me that you love me
Before I give up all hope
And you are embarrassed
That your only female offspring
Has been destroyed
And you held one piece of the key
To lock the new armor
And start her over anew