Dear old lover, You send me all these signs to remind me that you’re around. You come again and again to **** me over in your bed of lies, You give me cracked porcelain and glass expectations for me to mend with gold. But you’re a topaz among yellow diamonds, a ******* rube. But you’re Splenda, ******* Stevia. You’re overpriced, second hand Ikea, I’d push you into a swimming pool to ruin your silk tie. Your hands white from the bleach and peroxide, and collar yellow from nervous sweats. Yeah, you’ve got a library; dictionaries of medicine and candy sweet science, but you must have burned everything on doing a person right. You’re a double entendre pain-in-my-*******-*** with a Ken doll grin. Give Mr. Freeze his heart, and buy your soul back from the devil. As filthy as it is, you could do with a little in your life. Dear former friend, I want you like a salad of poison ivy, I need you like I need a nap, and I’m the designated driver. You’re chopped liver, and your humors are out of whack, The crown you wear is turning your forehead green and doesn’t fit quite right. I’m the beast and you’re the burden You’re the straw and this camel is kicking you off at last chance, last call, last stop Nowhereville You bathe in the bubbles of champagne dreams and silver fantasies, But I’m the cup of ambrosia gods long for, and you lost me.