You *******
Aka D.H.
by Ryan P. Kinney

You have potential
You have talent
So much so that it ****** me off to see you self-justify your own apathy
To make excuses why you are afraid to face the world.
To hear you give another reason why you are superior to the world in which you cower from.

You are capable of all that I have achieved.
We are only temporally separated.

I see a weak and pathetic child
Terrified of the changing world around you.
And while you are hobbled in hiding from this brave new world
You fester pretention
And waste your abilities
Getting more disillusioned and bitter as the days pass.

The world is not what you want.
It is not what you perceive.
So you cry about it.
And then pout
Saying, “I’m too good for it anyways.”
What could be more childish?

You lash out at your friends.
Attack their ideas and dreams
Because you’re so insecure of your own.
You are an intellectual bully.
I welcome new ideas.
While you attack them.

I am sick of hearing about my ego
It’s huge. It’s raging and throbbing.
It’s not just a metaphor. It is my ****.
My ego appreciates the attention

But, like the child throwing a tantrum
That you claim I am
You got what you want
Here we are, paying attention to you
And reacting to your ego

So go ahead, criticize me from your ivory tower of decaying domestic and psychological material.
Trying to kick your own dirt into our minds.

And my house, Its achievement is just as admirable as my college degree.
It may be a thing, a material, but the knowledge I gained in building my temple of self-worship is just as valuable as that I earned in college.
It is a superficial material possession, but it’s also a symbol.
It represents my journey, with steps I have taken that you will never imagine in your life.
My house is an art project, not just a shrine to my obvious American consumerism

Yes, it is a thing.
But then, so are you.
And one is far more impressive than the other.
One has had more life in it that the other.

Yes, I have stuff.
And I do lord my stuff over you,
As an example of the actions I’ve put behind my words.
I’ve worked,
While you’ve failed your days away.

I am a child that really enjoys his toys.
You are one who really enjoys telling others what they should do with theirs.
Jealous that you have none of your own.
You covet what I have.
You want what I have, but lack the determination it takes to get it.

You try to belittle my accomplishments and possessions.
Because you have so little of your own.
Grow up.

Your air of undeserved pride?
You’ve accomplished little.
I’ve accomplished little,
But my little is in comparison to the totality of my drive and desire.
And your little is sadly,
Only quantitative.

I use abstracts and circular logic
Because all of our existence is built upon fallible logic,
Perceptions of imaginations.
Life is circular.
It all repeats and falls in on itself.
I am sorry that you cannot see that my logic is a recognition of the balance in chaos.
The repeatability of all existence.
This has all happened before.
It will happen again.
Enjoy it and reassemble the time worn constituents of thought and experience into a perception of newness for you.

And here I am lecturing again.
Because you have so much to learn.
I have so much to learn.
It is not I who is so obstinate to new ideas that I reject all others
Simply because I think I am better than them

I do not think I am above or below you.
We stand on even planes.
It is called Earth.
Perhaps you should come back down here.
Step off your cloud.
Which, as soon as you realize is imaginary,
You will tumble from.

Join us here
We have so much to teach you.
Knowledge for knowledge’s sake.
Art for art’s sake.
Without the labels.

Who’s really superior?
Certainly not me.
You unbelievable *******.
So self-absorbed

You underestimate the tricks I have taught you, but do not hesitate to use them for yourself.
You are complicit in the crime of intellectual thievery.
And those tricks I’ve taught you
Which you dismiss so haphazardly,
Are nothing less than the sum total of my experience
The result of bleeding for life
Treat this knowledge with the respect it deserves

If I’m so morally repugnant then why do you still associate with me.
Because you are just as selfish and self-serving as me.
You’re just a weaker, chronologically repressed troll version of me.
Ryan, without the *****.

You have so little to flex your ego with
Oh sure, you have the mouth, but it means little in the face of your inaction.
The weight of words can only be felt when thrown by some action.
Stop wasting your time being useless.

You did say something in all your accusations that rang true.
I do fear being forgotten.
One day. Maybe I will stop fearing time so much.
One day I will wake up and realize that while I was fighting time
I filled it.
I gave it value, each minute of it.
Until then,
Enjoy the ride
And quit *******.