When you’re watching your TV,
And you see people in snappy suits,
Screeching about right and wrong,
Yelling how they will fix it all,
Doubt half of what you see,
And of what you hear, all.

‘Cause people like that, you know,
Can’t be trusted to lead a horse
To water, nor lead you and me.
Their words sound so nice and true,
But look in their eyes, my friend,
And see what really lies through.

Greed, avarice, and malice together,
Form the heart of people like them.
Demons in disguise, they are,
Monsters we gave human form.
Let’s not let these beasts of our burden
Become our new and stated norm.

And trust me well on this, folks.
For I’ve walked among the beasts.
And I know better than to trust them.
But let me say this, just to be sure.
You can definitely trust a man like me.
Of my honorable deeds, I needn’t assure.

Ah, this snappy suit of mine, you ask?
Well, don’t you worry none at all, pal,
Because I’m a guy you can trust your life to,  
A good, honest fella who you can depend on.
I’ll hold up them traditional values dear,
I’ll lead us all, you’ll see once I’ve won.