I don't want to forget
But I just can't remember
I could feel it, us sinking
Losing track of what made us
I lost myself in you
In your energy, your smile, the light you gave me
The hope, Haley, I found it again
That hope I ran from,
It's back and I'm scared
I'm scared to ask Hales
I asked you
Remember?
We were on the hammock all night.
Back and forth we went in time with the breeze.
One way, then another, fighting then kissing and crying.
You hated it.
You didn't want to answer but you did.
You answered and we fell asleep.
He smells like cedar Haley.
Mammaw always loved cedar.
She burned it after, you know.
I lost myself after
I'm sorry I didn't go to your funeral
In a way though, I've never left
I mourn everyday for you
And he heals the hole you left me with
Not covers, not fills
Heals.
I love him Hales.
You'd laugh and say handle bar mustaches were pelicans in their former life.
You signed my year book that.
I still have it.
It's blurred from the years I cried over that yearbook.
Our year.
You left before the next one was over.
Haley I love him, everything about him
He reminds me of that line we once heard. "His kiss bends me like a palm to the hurricane.
I crash against him.
Pushed to his feet, I beg."
It really is what we pictured.
He makes me laugh Hales.
So wild, but so cynical.
You used to tell people that about me
When I'd point out the problems in a joke
In a movie, cartoon
You used to say so wild but so cynical.
You were perfect Hales.
He's perfect babe.
I feel like a girl again.
I've been a woman taught how please for so long.
He makes me feel innocent. Happy.
He makes the missing pieces not hurt.
I miss you though.
I love you Haley.
I hope you're happy and peaceful wherever you are.
I hope you can see my smile Hales.
I hope it's almost as bright as yours.