i wonder why it's so hard to forget,
when that's the one thing in the world i would give anything to do.
i wonder what i did,
to make you act as cold as you do.
My heart no longer functions as it should,
whatever pieces are left of it pump endless pain.
it circulates it through every vein in my body;
its driven me insane
now that your gone
i see it all, it does nothing but amplify it
do you really think i deserve this?
and if not, then why do u inconsiderately intensify it?
i look back in regret,
they all told me you were perfect and i made a mistake.
i tried to fix it,
but all you did was dangle your heart like bait.
i want someone to hurt you,
make you die the way i do.
but my biggest mistake doesn't justify
the hell you've put me through.
is it possible to feel so weak,
while you're supposedly growing stronger?
i want this hurt to end
i can't handle it much longer.
you may be with her now
and your personalities might click
but we'll always be each other's first loves
no matter where our feelings may sit
someday you're gonna look back
and have to live with the guilt of what you've done.
but the only difference between ours will be,
the weight on your conscience won't be able to be undone.
and so i sit here and wait
for this hurt filled nausea to subside
yet even though i hate you,
you've never left my mind.
and so my biggest fear,
now that you've pulled the trigger on the gun;
is that if you call in the future,
will i fall into your arms or run?