I always broke myself with the chasing,

The touching...
But everything was so shiny and new.

I was on the sparkle path!

And it was so much better than the darkness and chaos that I left in my wake.

I wanted to find something better that could protect me and fend off the weather.

Some beautiful bastion of hope.

Maybe a white knight on a fiery stead.

Or a tower way up high filled with knowledge and power.

I started rushing this way and that, collecting artifacts and maps

like a kender filled to the brim with wanderlust and want...

But not all existences are sustainable and I spread myself ever so thin with searching for something outside myself.

I tried to find things and press them into me...
wrap them around me...
find terms so that people could see me...
but I was already there and I didn't understand it.

I  couldn't find a solace from the storm if I was too
blinded to see that the natural disaster was me.

It tore me apart from the inside out...
the core became so frail from reaching this way and that...
tatters of myself left strewn apart so disconnected and thin.

I would say ribbons, but it wasn't that pretty.

I am chaos and disorder,
trying to find focus and a steadying of mind...

they say the eye of the storm is quiet and calm.

I shrunk back to my core and built up walls around me.
From the eye of the storm I was able to see that there is no you,
there is only me.