I'm a master of Baguazhang. I will break your face like diamonds cutting glass: precise. I'll fall upon you like glorious Achilles wasting no time and hitting all of your weaknesses, knocking you off balance to your doom. Your nose will snap, your arm will shatter, your will as broken as your bones, you will submit to me! I dare anyone to attack me, even if he's ten feet taller; he doesn't stand a chance. I will crush his skull half a second before he realizes I'm upon him. I'm trained to ****, and I will. I dare you bring a gun. I dare you think about it. I am a monster. Only a true hero can defeat me.