How to breathe?

How do I go and share your air?

How do I stand in this space surrounded by his breath?

How do I exist in his exhale?
As part of his exhale?

Once a part, then drained, now expelled.

How do I act like I'm not hurting?

How do I go numb?  Numb but happy?

How do I find myself again when I was so sure that I knew myself.  I knew my trajectory.   I felt my own peace.

I've been on this path for so long.

Trying to change it on my own, in my way.  Subtle, Smooth, Caring, mine.

I don't know how to do this.

I am lost.
I have lost.
I am hurting.