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May 2016
I wish you could feel the weightless intensity of my words, because the gravity of honest intentions only drown you in hurt . My love for you baby is timeless and pure, though ironically thru faults of my own the retardent I add only complicates things as your heart grows hard this cannot be cured. I love you more than you could ever now, far more than I have the ability to show. This doesn't help nor make things easier, I just can't hide my feelings anymore. I'm done being a people pleaser. Though my mind may have strayed, my body and my heart next to yours is the only place my head has laid. That scares the hell out of me, in a world where I already feel forgotten. The seed we planted was well on its way to blossom, but this elephant in the room, ****** on it overtime bandaids couldn't stop it from rotting. I could care less about others or ****** advances, as it was about a lost excitement in my heart. Just the idea of possibilities more than our relationship being stable as long as I keep up my responsibilities. I know your lucky to have someone who gets you and still wants you. But this feeling of good enough makes our life of comprises look empty and rough. We put an expiration date on what we wanted to be love. But all that got us was sterility, a routine check up with a cold unfamiliar glove. I don't know what the right thing is to say most of the time anymore. I wanted to drown in your love but not feel your rain. I had previously tried to test the waters in asking questions trying to find resolve just left me wading through unanswered lessons. You want me here and I don't for a second doubt your love. But the source of it I often contemplate if I should just unplug. In many ways we try our best to make it work, but if we're not moving forward standing still for so long my heart starts to hurt. I won't change you or uproot the ways in which your set, but I'm not really myself around you my soul in some sense of neglect. In many things we don't share interest and sometimes that's ok. But a love that last should be more than complaced. I love you with all my heart, but say what you want my eyes can see it's easier for you too when we are apart. Just hard for your heart to accept when it's time to go to bed alone in the dark. You could easily do much better than me, but I fear that better than nothing is why you ignore it all and take the rest of me. You are always there yet some distance away. Somewhere between land or sea and sky you lay. I may move toward you, yet distant you'll stay. Looking for the light that used to be in your eyes is like the horizon that way.
Jeremy Washko
Written by
Jeremy Washko  Lexington, KY
(Lexington, KY)   
295
 
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