I don’t feel anymore
As a child I know I must have felt something
Sadness, happiness, love, anything
But now
I’m afraid I’ve lost my emotions
Somewhere
Deep inside
A string was cut that tethered my mind to my heart
And my heart to my mouth.

And when you touched me so softly
I should have felt something
Tremors through my hips moving up and down my body
I know what I’m supposed to feel
There should have been sparks when your lips touched mine
When you whispered in my ear over the pounding music
Outshone only by the pounding of my heart
Trying to beat out a rhythm to my brain
Some strange Morse code that was lost in translation.

I want more than anything to mend myself
To reattach the string that let love flow through my veins
But even when I try
When I light a liquor fire in my stomach
To mimic the burning of passion
My hands remain cold
Lifeless as they stroke the sides of your face
And I want to love it
I want to lay down beside it
Feel again like when I was a child
But it seems like only one emotion was spared
When the others were destroyed.

Fear.