this is for you because
you’ve left me with a wound in my chest
it misses your knife–
the one that used to fill it

you’ve left me wide open,
thoughts of you spilling out,
like guts, but i’d prefer guts
because those, i can clean up

why wouldn’t i drink whiskey to water down the ache?
you stung on my tongue
made my stomach warm
made me do the bad thing
left my head feeling bashed in

it’s the next best thing
works almost the same
even better–i can take a pill for the pain
in the morning
when i’m trying to get it out of my system
it lets me

because i am selfish,
i think to myself,
you’re too beautiful to be gone
because you are selfish,
i know
that you’re beautiful wherever the ******* are

i write this
trying to spite you
it’s about you because
everything
is always about you

even without you

god, i ******* love you