Will i ever wander again,
be & feel free to wonder & stray,
or remain this way, in this state ?

Am i losing my mind ?
Will peace ever again be mine ?
Is there space in my head,
is there enough recovery time ?

To want to die
is no choice of mine,
but no time for nine,
cats stitches to rhyme.

Please realise,
i've committed no crime,
the demons returned once more,
and invaded my mind.

Alone in a hole,
thats all i have as my home.
Temporary vacation i hope,
but its a long long road.

Hard to take,
is life real or fake ?
Muster a smile,
for even just a while.
Keep them at bay,
out of the way,
don't want to hurt them,
they wouldn't understand anyway.

The sadness i hide,
like a child, in solitude i cry,
feel i could die.

Twas here only yesterday,
then happiness moved swiftly away,
so for now in limbo i stay.

And everyday i die inside,
just that little bit more.
Surrounded by family & friends,
yet feel so insecure, lonely & unsure.

The burgeoning question that burdens, haunts & hurts my brain,
Will me & myself ever be friends again ?