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Feb 2016
you dont understand that leaving is the right thing to do.
that i have to, in order to cause you minimal pain.
the pain that i would cause by staying and continuing to hurt you would build up to be more than the pain i will cause by leaving.

my last relationship i ****** up and honestly i dont even know how i did it. the one person who loved me truly and purely, i pushed away for you and then you left and im not so sure what to do anymore.

your sister wrote down something and shared it anonymously but i knew who it was... i knew. and it hurt me, and made me think that if i leave and i fail, my sister will be in your sisters place. so i need to leave and i need to do it fast, and soon.

you dont understand my reasons but i know that someone someday someone will read this and know exactly why.

my mother doesnt really love me, and i dont know what the **** my father is to me. my step mom is overbearing and wont leave me alone...

my granddaddy told me days ago that i was his reason for living. i wish he hadnt told me that.

i have lost a lot of my friends... im stupid and i dont know why i do or say things. one of my cousins hates me, and i pretend to hate them too.

i could have been friends with my ex but i ****** that up.

i have all of these valid reasons in doing this. and still im a ******* coward and wont leave.

im overthinking.

so ill write. to everyone, and once i am finished, ill leave.

ill tie up all the lose ends, maybe ill even do it up in a nice little bow.
effaced
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effaced  purgatory
(purgatory)   
671
     Holly and - Aquamarine
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