i don't know why i insist on saying
the things that make me feel like i am cracking
glass as quietly as i do but
just know that when i was speaking i was trying to get you to
hear me but instead all i could hear was the stupid echoing hush
that was my voice saying
nothing was the matter.

so i start again, and believe me i try
to say these things out loud for what they are.

but instead i speak in stupid whispers
the  pesky  whisper that i always hear myself in
my pesky little petty stories running out of my mouth in
a hushed whisper cause that's all anything ever was for me

and don't say it isn't pesky
cause no one likes it when you whisper
and no one really wants to try to hear you again
and if they do, they are sad for you. they are sad
for your incompetence and they are sad
for you falling into incomprehensible hushes and for so many other things. but they're never the things you're trying to say so what good does it do
for them to be sad for you